Simplifying to Prepare

We are rounding the home stretch in our foster care licensure process. We have basically 3 weeks of classes left and a final interview with our licensing worker to finalize preferences etc. We are as ready physically and emotionally as we can possibly be, knowing that there is so much that we don't yet know, and so much that is impossible to know ahead of time. The car seat and stroller have been purchased, the crib and nursery are ready and we are getting the rest of the house ready to welcome a new addition.

So much had to be moved around. The bedrooms had to be swapped and combined, cabinets had to be rearranged and safety measures previously unnecessary taken. We have gotten rid of many trash bags worth of stuff, some to the thrift shop, some to the trash in an effort to simplify. This process of going through things and simplifying our stuff made me also look at what else in my life would need to be simplified in order to make room for a new little love. It made me take a good long look at what frustrated me, what needed a new system, what need attention and what needed to be forgotten.

There is certainly something to be said about life change begetting life change. Sometimes good things need to be said no to so great things can happen. Sometimes unrecognized toxicity is found out in the whirlwind of change. Progress always means movement because you can't go forward while standing in place.

So this led to evaluation. First of scheduling. I went down to the kids enrichment program today and asked the principal to help me figure out how to get the kids down to a single pick up time, rather than staggered over an hour. It was such an easy solution once I asked. I wish I would have asked to simplify earlier in the year and saved myself a lot of time and money in fast food treats while some of us waited for the others. I'm always surprised by the flexibility and willingness to help of others when I am vulnerable enough to raise my hand and ask for help.

The second thing that I looked at was the constant paper pile that had now made it's way to the recycle bin. There had to be a better way. I asked my husband, who has been mostly paperless in his job for years and he again, had an easy solution. Easy, but not as cheap as the first issue. I needed a new computer. Something that I could easily multi task with and organize the mass of paperwork that I was constantly loosing. He purchased me a new Surface Pro. I have been paperless for a couple of weeks now and it has been so freeing to know that I didn't loose the piece of paper!

I also looked around at the relationships in my life. Honestly, I SO want all of my neighbors to like me... but that has not turned out to be the case. I have had to accept that just because folks like in proximity to you, that makes them friendship material. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely believe we are to live at peace with our neighbors and we try hard to do that, but it isn't always possible. Sometimes living at peace means staying out of each others way until a time where circumstances change or God softens hearts and minds (both ours and theirs). I have learned to be careful with who I trust my heart with in true friendship and let the others be a friendly wave.

There seems to be a new layer of this with foster care. I know that hearts are in the right place and that folks don't want to see us get hurt. I know that they are misinformed or trying to relate, but we have certainly had to evaluate who we can talk to about our foster care journey and who we can't. This may have been the hardest part of this process. Learning who to trust, who will be our cheerleader, and who we should not share details with.

I'm certain that this is just the beginning of so many changes to come. I don't love change, but I welcome it. I know that discomfort means growth and that total dependence on the Father is right where he wants me.